What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

How do I complain on a boy coming to marriage with me without my involvement despite no connection with him though he had an illegal affair?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

I've never read the book. What did Dorian Grey do that was so immoral and sinful?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

How do I rat my boss out for serial cheating on his wife?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Make Nazis afraid again!

As a woman, what would be you response to a male friend’s offer of a full body massage?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What factors contributed to The Beatles' bitterness?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Craig admits to 'illegal move' in controversial 'no contest' - BBC

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Would you let your partner cheat on you every now and again?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Is Matt Gaetz qualified to be Attorney General of the United States?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

TEXT:

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

How can you tell if someone or someone's is trying to recruit or at least test you for a secret organization?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

How do you handle your mother-in-law after you heard her talking badly about you in the next room?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.